Culture Clash

As I have grown older, I have come to understand that culture is very important. The culture of a nation, the culture of a region, the culture of a town, even the culture of a neighborhood are very defining. People are shaped by their community and how the people interact with one another. We are shaped by the people and the physical place around us. When I first video skyped my daughter and showed her the street she said, "Damn, it looks like Italy." For many people in America there is now a culture of constant change as the average family moves every 3 years, new communities, new physical environment, and new culture lived out in rapid succession. This certainly was my experience having lived in over 30 homes in less than 45 years.

Where I live now, in my little town of Piegaro, Italy with less than 1,000 people, the borgo, or ancient part of town is less than a kilometer long, less than ½ kilometer wide. In less than a year here I am now in my third house, third neighborhood, all very different. When I told my daughter I was moving to a new neighborhood she said it was impossible, the town was 3 city blocks.... The first was the tourist hotel, sort of isolated behind the gate, the second was the piazzola (little piazza) with many of the older Italian citizens and families in the surrounding neighborhood, and now I am living at the other end of town in the neighborhood of immigrants. I also spend a good deal of time in the Piazza, the central square of town with friends who are also old Italian families, but a different culture than the piazzola. Then of course there are those who live in the outskirts and the new sections of town, each very different from each other.

What has been interesting in the last few weeks is that the more ingrained into the village I get, it is more apparent the alliances folks have. It has always been my practice to live by the credo of the 1940’s radio detective, Boston Blackie who was “Friend to those who had no friends, and enemy to no one.” But the reality of life is that we always have our circles of friends, our groups, those who we culturally identify most with. For me it became apparent that at some point I would have to choose my preferred circle, and for me that means walking gingerly to keep all the wonderful relationships I have formed in all circles as I have worked diligently to learn the Italian language from the locals, because the relationships are always more important than the words. However, as the norm of any society, we form circles of friends, circles of society.

It is ironic for me that my immigrant friends here in Piegaro for the most part do not live in my neighborhood, they live in other areas. So as a person who grew up poor and lived most of my life in immigrant neighborhoods, these are the folks I least connect with. They are dear and have brought me nuts and fruits of the fields, and their children play in front of my house and are cute as can be, but they mostly speak their native tongues which is actually difficult for me as I try to learn Italian. Instead I find myself similar to them in that people have difficulty understanding my “dialect” but different in that I am not from one of these large immigrant groups, and thus not seen as an immigrant, instead I am “la Americana”. I am a culture all of my own here.

Now, there is one thing common in the culture of all these groups in my life now that I have become Catholic and finished the sacraments of cressima and prima communion, it is now time for my next sacrament, either the life of a nun or get married. This is very different than my American culture, no matter where I was in America. After a few misplaced knee jerk reactions on my part to these ideas, I am resting in the recommendation of my priest at confession, my friend Bruno, and even the words of the women of Mary’s as they sent me on my way: Piano, Piano Lisa (slowly, softy, take it easy). For all the well meaning love of my circle of friends of this village, there is plenty of time to make any next sacramental steps.

It is grace to have daily mass here, to partake in a sacrament every day. To experience with a variety of people in the grace of God, and to know that beyond cultural boundaries there is love and grace that goes deep. Friends here, in America, and in certainly the Spirit of God all speak with a unified voice beyond culture that calls for a life that is led softly and slowly. A life of graceful living.

Where have you experienced different cultures in your life?
Did you find grace or difficulty or both?
How do you live within the call of the Spirit, for you what does this mean? (for me piano, piano)